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Alexander Winfield

Invite Even Heroes can be Wounded

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Spencer ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Guitarist/Vocalist - Local School Hero!✩ Kaitore
19 year old Halfbreed Sorceraic ☆ HE/HIM

The night had been rough way too many revelations, too much information - loss in more ways than one and trying to figure it all at once was becoming seemingly more impossible. After he had spent the remainder of the day before at Cass and her Aunt's house the two made their way to school, but he had to stop off by his Dormitory room anyways. Drop off the clothes he has grabbed for himself and just stood there looking at the undisturbed note. It seemed no one else would actually know perhaps aside from the small rumors around the school that 'The Guitar Guy ran out of the Common room like a bat out of hell and hadn't been back in a bit.' He took the time to switch into his school uniform with the short sleeved shirt, long trousers with the brown shoes and used the usual vest with Spencer colors on the collar. This time he decided to bring Sapphire around campus with him because something told him today was when he'll need it the most. 

He needed a form of serenity and ironically enough he could only find it within the Memorial Garden and so he found himself inside of its gentle embrace and greenery walls. Maybe it was strange that he found comfort in the presence of something intended to immortalize his sister and niece, rest her soul. Instead of walking towards the fountain he took a careful perch right under a tree and whipped the guitar across himself and rested it on his lap gently. Though it hadn't been before he left a small little note for Gerry, at least for one of her Housemates to give to her since he knew the brunette wouldn't be the patient sort. She'd rage around the Tallygarunga grounds until she found him to give him a piece of her mind, that was for sure. The note simply would be 'You know where to find the Siren's Call'. Cryptic, but it was perhaps more of a personal code between the two of them as friends, as their inside joke about his 'Voice'. 

Alexander just needed to make sure his mind was clear before she arrived and he needed it to not be in a vicinity where her and his girlfriend would get into some kind of argument, a pissing match of sorts. Here he only thought the males had measuring contests but even women seemed to embrace their own set of rules and regulations when it came to reaching out to those they care about. He huffed and his eyes closed gently and his fingers danced along the strings of guitar in the most solemn of sounds that he perhaps had ever played, aside from the one time he found a bit of piece in the Musiciary room. A song pressed from his lips and the tone was perhaps his more heartfelt harmonic tones to the point even the pain and sadness seemed to be pressured into each word and syllable that had been sung out. (Human

Even the actual build up within the way his finger strummed within the strings showed a sense of frustration and outpour of emotion that he just couldn't allow himself to burst outwards so easily, not this time, not with so much resting in him from what his Mother had said, not after dealing with his Father's death, not after dealing having to keep two people he cared about from trying to crash into one another. 

 

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Sturt ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Student/Janitor✩ Shell
16 year old Muggleborn Human ☆ She/Her

When she'd sent her first message she'd been mad, sure, but mostly?  She'd been worried.  She'd only wanted to be there for him, and as always, he'd shut her out of it.  But hearing that Cass ahd been there the whole time?  That was it.  That was the trigger.  That was the raw, epxosed nerve.  And he knew she ahd it.  She'd shoved it in his face once already.  He should have known better than to pull this shit with her.  Again.  He was jerking her around and she hated it, hated that she cared so much about someone who didn't give her a second thought.  

When she started throwing things and sreaming, her roommate was out of the room in a heartbeat and never looked back.  She kept the act up for a good fifteen minutes beore she sat down on her bed, legs beneath her and hunched all the way until her forehead touoched the mattress.  Her hand pounded at its surface again and again as stubborn tears she didn't want rolled down her cheeks.  She took a few deep breaths and let out another scream, then wiped her face and stood in frotn of hte mirror.  She quickly reapplied her makeup, covered up the evidence, and burst though the door.  She'd gotten another message in that time.  They'd pack up and move later. She rolled her eyes. Whatever.  Then she'd go back to her first plan.

Geraldine made her way from her dorm out and made her way to stand some ways in front of the school, the look of fury on her face keeping everyone at a distance.  She'd said before she'd wait out in the sun until he got there, and she meant it.  He wasn't going to have any chance whatsoever in getting past her.  And so she waited.  Luckily it was morning, and the sun wasn't at its high point, because as was typical for her, she didn't bother to remember sunscreen at all.  Her hat was in her hands, not that she was bothering to wear it.

Eventually he showed up, with Cass in tow no less.  The scumbag.  She wasn't going to talk with him when she was around.  Her focus fell entirely on Alex and she pretended that Cass didn't even exist, turning her back to her, completely blocking her out.  She was in no mood to play nice, and she'd made no secret of that.  

She stayed on his heels everywhere he went, including into his dorm room.  She'd folded her arms as she leaned against a wall, , staring at her feet with a cocked eyebrow as she waited for him to change.  Then he was out again and she was back to staying on his heels.  Where the hell was he going?  He could pretend she didn't exist much the same way she'd been acting like Cass didn't, but she wasn't going to drop off.  Eventually he'd have to notice her, if only to tell her to buzz off.

She watched, peering around him as he scribbled a note and left instructions to one of her housemates as if she weren't standing right with him.  They stared at him as if he were absolutely insane.  The freaking hell was this bullshit?  She ripped the note out of the person's hands as soon as Alex turned away and looked at it.  Oh sure, now he was leaving her a note?  She crumpled it up angrily and shoved it into a pocket before she set back to following him.

He made his way to the memorial garden, and she had to give a quiet, angry "Ha!" at that.  Of course it would be here of all places.  When she caught up he was already sitting under a tree, having already started to play.  She could feel her blood boiling just beneath the surface as her hands clenched into fists and shook.  She was about to start yelling at him when he began to sing.  Her voice became lost even as her mouth was open, hand whipping through the air.  What.  The actual.  Fuck?

Her mouth clamped back shut as she fumed internally.  Jerk.  Donkey dick.  He knew by now didn't he?  That she couldn't do shit the second he started singing.  She just couldn't, even though she wanted to.  There was a reaso she gave him that paritcular nickname, even if she had layered it under jokes and sarcasm.  She had to ride out the song.  And he had to pick something like that to sing.  She was clawing desperately to hold onto her anger.  She didn't want to lapse into something else.

As soon as he finished she kicked dirt at him and threw the wadded paper from her pocket as his face, really getting her arm into the swing of the throw.  "You're a real piece of work." She spat at him.  Was she still invisible?  She'd make it hard for him to ignore her now that they were on their own.

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Spencer ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Guitarist/Vocalist - Local School Hero!✩ Kaitore
19 year old Halfbreed Sorceraic ☆ HE/HIM

Truthfully he hated noticed much of anything since he had arrived at the school and once he had departed from Cass at the Spencer Common Room his mind still was going at a slugs pace in keeping everything in his sight just a bit more focused. The note wasn't a way to try and 'make an excuse' for anything, he didn't need to, there was no crime no ill fitted notion or reason that he needed to do anything other than speak with her. Even as she stalked him, literally, through the whole entire school he didn't notice a single thing or listen to any sound of footsteps. 

After his song had finished a gentle sigh escaped from him and his gaze still never lifted from a lowered state. At least his eyes had been opened enough to see a wave of dirt sweep towards his direction and still that didn't draw too much of his attention just enough to weakly lift his head up. "Gerry. . .? When did you get here?" His eyes showed he was distances away, nothing was catching up easily, even the paper smacked him right in the face and still there seemed to be very little reaction physically other than a flinch. "What is your deal. . .?" He was tired, he was weak and just fed up with just so much. This apparently was the week to shove things in his face whether it be a paper or some informative fact that he was a mistake, that his father was a live, and that he was only brought here to have a 'Happy Ending'. 

"If you're just going to yell at me for not telling anyone then just let it rip. . . I've already heard it and more. . . " At the moment he didn't want to start throwing up his dukes, he didn't want to just swing his hands. Hell, he only tried to contact her out her to stem her anger towards Cass and to halt her need for worrying. He wasn't the one in the hospital bed, he just had to watch something that very few would ever be able to even console in the first place. "Let's just add one more thing for my plate, alright? Come on. . . Lets hear it."

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Sturt ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Student/Janitor✩ Shell
16 year old Muggleborn Human ☆ She/Her

"I've been here the entire time!" she siad in a huff, placing her hands on her hips.  "Like I told you.  I waited for you.  Once you were on school grounds I was with you.  But I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you didn't notice me."

"What's my deal?" she repated.  He looked up to her, acting like he didn't know a damn thing that was going on.  It wasn't until she looked right back at him--really looked--that she saw the look in his eyes and she remembered the original reason she was angry.  Not that she was willing to just let the rest of it go.  Maybe he hadn't realized, but it didn't change how she was feeling, and, for the most part, she'd been pretty open about those, at least.

She let out a shaky breath through her nose as she shook her head and looked around.  She kicked at the dirt again as she clenched her jaw, but this time made a point to make sure it was aimed away from him.  How could be this stupid?  She turned back to him, tongue pressing against the inside of her teeth.  He wanted it out?  Fine. He could have it out.

"My deal is that you act like you give a shit.  You use your stupid words and that stupid smile and say things like 'you're important to me' but you don't mean a damn word of it!  It's like I'm just some toy for you to play and amuse yourself with when you're not around that thing!  I'm sick of it!"

She could have stopped there.  Probably should have, but now that the floodgates were open they were stuck.  "I clearly don't meant shit!  There is nothing you get from me that you don't already get from her.  You've made that pretty clear, and I tried to swallow it when you slapped me with it the other day.  But this is just ridiculous."

She dug her nails into her palms as hard as she could manage.  Anything.  Anything to stave off the shaking.  "I tried.  I was okay with your all being a thing.  That was fine.  But now it's like I barely even exist.  You call me a friend but you don't mean a word of it.  You can't."

She swallowed, trying to draw in a breath, trying her hardest to calm down.  But it was like trying to stop water from moving.  She didn't want to cry.  She didn't want to have a fight with him, again.  Especially not here at school.  Especially not in this place.  "Friends are supposed to support each other.  But you won't let me!  You won't tell me anything unless I pester your or force it out of you."

She scoffed and shook her head, hands moving into her hair.  "Oh, but you can tell her fine.  Just like always.  You can tell her anything and everything while I'm expected to sit back and be okay with you trying to keep me ignorant.  That's bullshit.  That is fucking bullshit Alex."

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Spencer ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Guitarist/Vocalist - Local School Hero!✩ Kaitore
19 year old Halfbreed Sorceraic ☆ HE/HIM

Even with everything going on within himself he sat there and listened to her, the weight of her words, her feelings and view point saddled into his shoulders. The accusations she made, even more so, to bring up his and Cassandra's relationship in the first place. He knew that Gerry wasn't passed it but at the same time it would have been wrong, a lie, for Cass and Him to -not- be what they were to one another. A smile. . . At this moment he didn't even think he could find it let alone remember it from the various memories that still shifted into his mind. "She isn't a 'thing' her names -Cassandra-. Respect her as a person! Just like I would tell anyone to respect you! And I don't toy with people! If you weren't important? I wouldn't have told you what I have! Don't try to stand on the moral ground of respect with crap like that, Gerry!" The trigger wasn't that she had attacked him, no, she was attacking Cassandra - the woman whom he had grown to love. 

"Slapped you with it!? What? Did you prefer I lead you both along? Just let it all collapse like it was some joke to me? That I didn't care about peoples feelings? Yes, there is a special place in my life for her because she is my girlfriend. that isn't me showboating it or trying to make you feel bad. That is the truth of the matter! You think a -SINGLE- Person can solve every freaking thing!? Yes, she's been there - Even at times I didn't seek her out. At times where I PURPOSEFULLY left -everyone- in the dark. But that doesn't mean I don't need friends, nor does it mean that I don't spend time with them or give them attention!" Did she think she was some kind of special case that he excluded? Even Adele didn't know, his own sister - and thank Merlin for that because that was a whole new can of damned words he needed to open up. 

"Do you have any idea what it's like to know to -SEE- someone die and know that every ounce of it because of your damned existence?" Very few can claim that, as much as someone may preach that Alex wasn't the cause of it that was a lie. Symptom, a cause, either way he was a factor that lead to the death of a man by drink, maybe it was his choice but he didn't even need to make that choice if someone had done something right. "Do you really think I want other people to know that about me so easily? I'd rather they find out I'm dying than that! And if you didn't 'mean shit'? I wouldn't have made the effort to go ALL the way to your Common House to leave a -NOTE- for you to meet me here." He looked around the Garden, no, he needed to curb himself but it was a bit too much with the confliction of emotions that raged on the inside of him. "Oh, Hello Kettle!? Do you forget how much it takes me to twist -your- arm too?

He pressed his hands to his face as he shook his head almost as if there demons within himself were combating which one should be left to fight first. Just then a small orange tabby cat seemed to leap from the foliage of the Garden and bolt towards Alexander's lap almost snuggling against it and shutting her eyes tightly. His eyes narrowed towards the feline before gently stroking the fur to keep himself calm, to keep his mind from being too clouded. 

"You are so misinformed it isn't even funny. Do you think I told her the full details about my father? I didn't even tell my own Sister. She was as blind sided as everyone else. The -Hospital- called the school. That was a moment I didn't want anyone to see me in, a moment where I was reminded more than enough that I was a mistake in a good man's life." Sit back and keep her ignorant. . .He'd keep everyone ignorant if he could - shield them from more than what they needed to hear or wanted to hear. If only she also knew just how much in common he and Cass had that made it easier. . .  But would that even matter?

This had been a one way street. He had told her more than she had ever told him. But he wasn't going to throw that in her face, no, he was above that. He'd never willingly try to take a knife into a friends very core of what made them shrink into that dark place. "You forget I told you -without- pushing, that Adele was a Sister I found. That I had a family that I was interested in getting to know." He huffed heavily and turned his gaze away from Geraldine as his teeth ground against the inside of his cheek. "This isn't some kind of competition. This isn't a 'Whose better, whose there more. Whose the best support.'

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Sturt ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Student/Janitor✩ Shell
16 year old Muggleborn Human ☆ She/Her

"She's a fucking thing to me, and you can't tell me different.  Nor can you tell me how to refer to her."  Her voice dropped cold, the boil, the heat that had been lost rising once more as he dared try and tell her how to think and talk.  She laughed at him, something dead and awful.  "What moral ground do you think I have?  I told you before there nearly is none."  And that was what she believed.  It had been a long time since she had ever truly thought well of herself.  It was only his insistence that she even had good points that she'd even started to open that lid.  Now it was slammed back shut.

"That is not what I am even talking about!" she said as he seemed to bring up a much older conversation.  "That shit was weeks ago!  Days, Alex.  Days.  YOu seriously think, even after I just said your dating isn't my issue, that it is?  Merlin's ratty socks!  That's not my issue!  If I wasn't okay ywith that, I wouldn't have agreed, I wouldn't have been peaceful for those weeks!  I just thought, 'Well if that makes him happy, then I'm fine with it."  And that's exactly how she felt.  As much as it hurt, as difficult as it was, as much ash she made the occasional little vomit motion at their nicknames... she just wanted him happy.  And if that meant Cass, then that was fine.  Their romantic relationship was nowhere near her issues.

He then went off about his father, and watching him die, and she glared at him.  "No, I don't." she said, her voice dropping back to the cool, low tones.  She shook her head at his stupid note.  "Yeah, my common house.  When I was literally with you every step of the way.  But wait.  I'm invisible, even when I'm standing two feet from you in your own room."  The first, and only, time she'd ever broken that particular school rule.

"Okay, POT--" she spat back at him.  She was up and down between fire and ice.  "I told you that you could ask me whenever.  You smply choose not to.  Moreover, there is not a single thing happening in my life right now that you don't know about anyway!  Everything I have to tell is old!  WIth you it's current events headlines everywhere!"  His dying, his father.  This was all here and in the now.  It wasn't something that happened two years ago, or eight years ago.  It was acively breathing--and dying.

He tried to hide behind the school and threw her hands up.  "Oh, so she just magically knew then?  What, she shows up and it doesn't occur to you to let anyone else know?!"  It didn't occur to him that it was going to be a problem later?  Maybe she should have been kinder, should have seen it from his end.  She was never good at putting herself in someone else's shoes.

But just like her, it went in one ear and out the other with him.  She was thankful for her sunglasses.  It kept him from seeing the tears that were welling up.  He couldn't even seem to begin to fathom why she was upset.

"You're right, I did forget that." she said, trying to swallow.  "But that's it."  She let out a shaky breath as her nails dug at her scalp.  Anything to keep her hands busy.  "It's not small.  God, I know how upsetting it can be to find out you have a sister you never knew about.  But damnit Alex..."

She was tired.  She was tired of launching against a wall.  She was tired of feeling this way, and to feel it all the time.  "Do you not get it?  All I want is to be your friend and be here for you.  But you won't let me.."  It was one-sided.  She'd already given him that open door.  She might not just pour out all her past, but she'd given him the green light on those questions awhile ago.

"I was right there with you.  All day.  I was there and you didn't say a damn word to be about it.  Then I spent all of yesterday freaking out wondering where the hell you are, and all I can find out other thing the knowing but silent stares from teachers is that people saw you fly out your door."  

She couldn't help the way her voice broke.  And she cleared her throat and tried to fix it, folding her arms over her chest as she paced around instead, then stopped and kicked the tree.  Anything to stay mad.  Whatever she could do to stay mad.  Anger was strength.  Everything else was weakness.  She couldn't be weak. Not here.  Not at this damn school.  "I didn't know what to think.  Were you running away?  Did something horrible happen to you?  All I could do was freak out.  So I went to the pitch becacuse lord knows you don't answer your stupid phone."  To try and forget her worries.  "It could have been you in that bed for all I knew!"  She said, raising her voice again as she gave the tree antoher swift kick.  All he did was disappear.

She started hitting the tree too.  To vent it out, to get it out.  Somehow.  Because she wasn't going to swing or kick at him.  She refused.  So she took it out on the tree instead.  "And then I found out she's there with you, and you're fine but your dad is dead.  And what was I doing but sitting in class? I should have been there.  I should have been there! "  But she wasn't.  Because she wasn't good enough.  Because he didn't trust her.  Because their whoel friendship must have been some sort of facade.

"I told you I didn't want to be protected!  I thought I made it clear I hate being left in the dark.  Besides, how can there be a competition?  I can't be your friend if you don't let me, and you're not letting me.   I will always lose."

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Spencer ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Guitarist/Vocalist - Local School Hero!✩ Kaitore
19 year old Halfbreed Sorceraic ☆ HE/HIM

Alexander's jaw set tightly to the point he could probably lock it in place with pure will alone. She didn't know or even care how deep that kind of wound from her words formed. A sudden spark of fire lit a nearby patch of grass as if in an instant. That was Lillian that time, he was going to take full responsibility for it. "Then I don't know what kind of person you are to me. . . Because I won't have someone that -claims- they want to be a friend, -claims- they care, say such a thing about the woman I love. . . ." The difference between him and Cass had been those in her old home -knew- of what she was, Half Breed, in England? That was a bad thing. Alex didn't find out about his nature but even then the lid of ignorance and hate towards them had been fluent in Australia as well. He knew Cass would never use what she had been through as a crutch even still. . . 

"I wasn't paying attention to anything enough to notice other people. . . Again, we go back to 'Me me me', No. I wasn't looking around for you because how was I supposed to know someone was -stalking- me? All I wanted to do was get my stuff back to my room, meet you somewhere and talk like an -adult-. But no, confrontation, your own feelings - that's all you care about in the moment."

He scoffed at her. "What you think is current headlines is stuff I've always been dealing with, what is news to everyone ISN'T news to me. I've been dying since the day I was freaking -born-. My father had been drinking himself to a stupor of stress since I was seven years old. In what universe is that 'Current Headlines'? " He shook his head soon after. "Do you not look at your schedule?! Her Aunt is a counselor for the school. What the hell do you think is normal procedure when the school gets a grief call? They call the Counselor, Which means if her aunt is one, -clearly- she told her niece that, I don't know, her Boyfriend needed someone? And I called my Sister, unless you think I shouldn't have?" What, did he revolve around only her world? Was he supposed to be -only- hers when she wanted him to speak up? "I could barely even do that with enough strength. " He didn't even dial the number!

"No, no. You don't know on this level." Even if their situations had been similar, she couldn't. He didn't just find out that he had a Sister, an entire family, that same day he found out about his own mother. Just how she had watched from the side lines and seen him squirm for years, how casually she had been with such a mocking smile. "You don't know because you've never -once- considered anything from my side. " Not once, never had she ever stopped to thing she had always been a whirlwind of her own emotions, her own care, focused on only herself. 

"I don't let you? I let you all the freaking time! The last thing on my mind was searching about for people who were around me. Sorry, having your parent die kind of makes everything zone out around you. My bad for not taking you into consideration on that." That was spite, oh, such a spiteful remark. He was still trying to reel it from her Mother, still trying to reel in from the supposed friend insulting his Girlfriend. "You're not supposed use a phone in a Hospital, Gerry. That is  the whole point of them placing signs that say to turn it off.

It could have been him. . . That was so far wrong but he couldn't correct on why. It wouldn't be a hospital bed that he found himself in not when it came to what was the causality towards his health. "I don't run, I've never run. I face my responsibilities and the things I've caused. I don't thrash at the world, I don't moan and shout out, I get out and I move forward. Because that is how I taught myself to be." Yet, she still seemed to focus on Cassandra. After all that bleating that it had nothing to do with her, her focus still seemed to zero in on that. 

"No. . . No one should have been there. . ." That was all he could whisper out softly. No one should have heard the things Lillian told him, the way she spoke to him. That mixture of false concern with all the brute force of revelation that was made so flippantly. "Not every event needs someone there! Sometimes its the AFTERMATH that matters! You have a prime chance, here, now, To be a friend. To be SUPPORTIVE! I ask you, Gerry, WHAT! What are you doing with this chance!?

Never one to focus in on himself, the thought of Lillian's words actually rang true within himself. Selfishness. "Your friend has lost his father, Lost the only long standing root of relationship he has ever known. No extended family, no mother who gives a damn. Only Sisters, Nieces, and Nephews he is still trying to understand and know, A girlfriend - Which you keep insulting - While you claw to the mantle of wanting to be my friend. Yet, here I am. . . Angered, Hurt, Confused, trying to collect myself from what I had to face JUST yesterday! And you make this shit about YOU! Not us, not our friendship, not how you can just be there in the moment that is given to all of us.

"You don't lose because of me keeping you out. .." No, this was beyond that. "You lose because you ignore your chances to be friend because you don't know how. All this time all you cared about was how you feel. You never once, asked me, how I was doing. Am I holding up? What do I need? Did you?! WELL!? Did you!?"

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Sturt ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Student/Janitor✩ Shell
16 year old Muggleborn Human ☆ She/Her

This time she didn't interrupt him.  She let him get it all out.  What else could she do?  It wasn't as if he were wrong.  He pushed back at her as hard as she pushed at him.  It was expected.  It was hoped for.  She hated herself.  She hated the way she lashed out at everyone--but most especially those she cared about.  She needed someone to keep her in check, to cool her rages when they came.  A verbal slap in the face did just that.

Her temper seeped straight out of her, and all she felt was tired.  Tired, and guilty.  "You can't make me like or respect anyone.  Just because I call her that right now doesn't mean i don't respect her.  I have far worse words for that.  It only means I don't like her.  If you're gonna get uppity because one of your friends and your girlfriend don't get along, then you're going to have one hell of a time."

She wouldn't apologize.  She wouldn't apologize for how she felt, or anything she said.  It simply wasn't in her nature.  He always told her she should be open, and there he had it.  Pure, unfiltered open communication.  She didn't share anything her ass.  "Maybe it is your past.  But it's still happening to you now."  All the bite left her voice.  

She left the poor tree alone, ignoring the throbbing and stinging she felt in her hands.  "You are right though.  I'm a selfish, raging bitch.  And I did try warning you.  But you were a bug that was going to stick.  And I believed that."  She should have known better.  "I know my faults better than anyone else.  I live with them."

So what?  He was giving up on their friendship because of one word and an attitude she already told him about?  Was this whole thing just a lie then?  "You can tell me I don't know how and I say you're right.  I told you that too.  I don't really know how to do friends.  Never have."  She shrugged.

The motion reminded her of the weight on her back, and she pulled her backpack down and unzipped it, digging through to a stack of papers clipped together.  She pulled them out and offered them to Alex.  "I copied all my notes from our classes yesterday. And the homework assignment.  ....I even did some of the homework, made sure it was different from my own.  You can use it or throw it away.  Your choice."

She looked at the ground.  "I say all this about wanting to be there, about you not asking stuff....but I don't ask either. Just like you said.  Despite all the desire in the world...I'm not really here, am I?"  She felt more like a burden than ever.  "Do you need me to go?"

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Spencer ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Guitarist/Vocalist - Local School Hero!✩ Kaitore
19 year old Halfbreed Sorceraic ☆ HE/HIM

Eyes closed tightly as he took a soft breath to ease himself, everything that had came out of him was a culmination of things. Not all of her had been lite ablaze by Gerry but she had been the final impact against the dam within himself. Nothing could have prepared him for what he faced, no amount of comfort could completely erase the pain - maybe dull it but that was the maximum of its effect for something so deeply engrained. She was an idiot, but not for the things she may have thought in his mind may have made him think that. She was an idiot to think he fought back to wound, when he fought, he fought to keep. 

"Gerry, Calling her a 'Thing' is disrespectful. Because of the sheer fact that you don't know much of her. The past, what she may have went through. Even thinking it alone implies a regard that someone is less than a person. It isn't about liking or disliking, I don't expect every friend to like one another just because I do. Would it be nice? Ideal? Sure. But I am asking for respect not hand holding and a fa-la-la-la-la, moment. You two don't like each other? You two need to figure that out as people. But as far as respect goes? I am of the mind everyone respects everyone because of the fact that we don't know how much that simple gesture would mean." Not with the kind of past that Cass held, being a Half-Breed she'd have already been discriminated against. On top of that. . . It'd only remind him that Gerry would one day consider him 'Just a Thing' if word ever got out about his 'Half-breed' heritage. 

Well, she actually had him on that. "You're right. It is happening to me right now. But the last thing I need is more people trying to yell at me for something that I can't control on both spectrums. In this case, the thing I need most are the friends that are willing to try and be there. Even if they're mad that I didn't tell them right away, that they at least side that anger and consider the bigger picture." Bigger picture, why the hell did he sound like his Mother. He's going need to wash his mouth out with soap. 

The Tabby Cat after what seemed to be a calm atmosphere started to retreat from Alex's lap after giving a swift lick of his hand to let him known she was leaving and headed away in somewhat of a saddened swagger. A deeper concern wove within himself. Again, something that shouldn't have been heard but there were responsibilities he'll need to take of later. 

As a result he listened to her a bit longer without interrupting her this time and started to stand up and brush his clothing down. Then walked over towards her to bring the brunette into a tight hug. "You are still a very silly Old Biddie. No, I don't need you to go. I didn't say what I did as a way to harm you, to push you away. You don't listen unless I swing hard in the same way. I needed you calm enough, to hear me." He pulled back from her and gently took the papers to give a gentle bow of gratitude towards the woman. 

"Being friends, means we fight. We'll argue. It means we need to grow and learn - not keep things deep down but not let it fester and control us. We need to try to understand one another. It also means, as much as I know it hurts, you need to try and at least respect Cassandra by not seeing her as a thing - but as a person. Maybe at some point you two can see eye to eye, maybe at some point there will be a chance just to get that hurt out into the air towards one another." His hand rested on her shoulder. "But because she is important to me, I expect just respect. Just as much as I would never let her or anyone disrespect you, because you will always be my friend as long as there is respect between us and what we both cherish individually and as a friendship.

Was he upset? Sure, but he had said his piece of cracked rage before and that was all that had seemingly needed to be done so that things could be dropped to a less volatile state. "Selfishness isn't always a bad thing, when regulated and used for the right reasons. I don't expect you to learn something you don't know instantly, but if we're going to do this friendship thing we'll need to be willing to learn, you know? " He wasn't giving up on her, even the tone of his voice stated that much. "Right now. . . Just need to know one of my best friends is there for me too."

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Sturt ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Student/Janitor✩ Shell
16 year old Muggleborn Human ☆ She/Her

Bigger pictures.  She was terrible at bigger pictues.  Ha, go figure.  She watched the cat leave.  Odd.   He was living in some weird fantasy land, that much she was sure of.  Him thinking that everyone respected everyone?  That was truly laughable.  This one school didn't even manage that, let alone everywhere else.  Could he ask for people to have that?  Yes.  Did it mean they'd follow through?  No.

He hugged her, much to her surprise.  She dropped her bag, wrapping her arms around him.  He always knew how to talk her back down, even if he worked her up all the more first.  He pulled away again, and she looked up at him as she continued to listen, each taking their turn.  

"She is a person.  I don't use that word to describe someone as anything less.  It's an irritation.  But...if you feel that strongly about it...then I'll find something else."  She might as well cave, it wasn't like they were ever going to see eye to eye on that.  She had no idea what word she was going to use, though.

"I know you didn't I just....."  she sighed.  She just what?  How else could she explain it?  "I'm glad you did that.  Honestly I don't know that there's any other way to calm me down."  She couldn't even calm herself if she wanted to.  She learned that one a long time ago.  She would keep going until something forced her down, or the other person walked away.

She moved to lean against the tree, leaning her head back against it as she stared up at the branches.  "What are you asking Alex?  For me not to be angry?  That's what I am--all the time.  Just angry.  Angry at myself.  Angry at everyone else.  It doesn't go away, it just has varying degrees."  She tried thinking to a time when she didn't feel angry.  In the last week.  In the last month.  There wasn't one.  Even when she was happy....she was still angry.  About something or someone.  Usually herself.  Mad that she was allowing herself to get close to anyone, mostly.  Mad that she was willingly opening the door to disappointment and pain.  Mad that she was letting everyone down because she couldn't be the perfect person it felt like they all wanted, or even be the person she heself wanted.

No.  It wasn't what he was asking.  That was just how she took it.  She shook her head and held up a hand.  "You don't need to answer that.  Wrong question.  That's just me being snippy."  she said quietly.  He wanted her to curb it, not feel it.  Although with how strongly she felt her emotions, it was almost, but not quite, the same thing.  

What he wanted as an answer, and it wasn't one she could give the answer he was looking for.  "What I think is being there for someone, and what you think is being there for someone, are apparently two very different things.  I think we just proved that one." She was entirely too physical, and too literal for it.  To her, being there was physically being there.  In that time.  I wasn't some drop by check in later on, which is what she was understanding he was looking for.  

She didn't know what to say to him to keep from further aggravating the already precarious situation.  'What am I supposed to do?' she wondered.  'Carry on, being worthless?'  It wasn't how he saw it--it was how she saw it.  'Step back how he wants, or keeping having this fight until he gets tired of it?'  Her head turned away to stare at something, anything else as the debate roiled inside.  'What hurts more Gerry?  Hating yourself a little more every day, or losing him?  Will you stick to your beliefs, or turn into the air around you?  What's your choice?'

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Spencer ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Guitarist/Vocalist - Local School Hero!✩ Kaitore
19 year old Halfbreed Sorceraic ☆ HE/HIM

Shook his head and sighed softly with a hand rubbing at his forehead. It seemed he just had a very difficult of getting people to see his way, they may comply, but never truly see. But how could he ask her to see at all? What they were had been. . .  Different. She'd never have to face the idea of people considering her as a 'Thing' not in the sense most of the wizarding world used to describe people like himself, like Cass. More so Cass since he was more hidden to society when it came to part of his heritage. He needed to drop it for now - if it came to her he'd stand up for Cass again but at the moment it'd just draw more into another argument and he was personally just sick of being in a combative nature for the moment. 

"I would rather not have to do that every time I need to have a conversation." He admitted honestly. His head lobbed left and right for a moment in thought before he spoke up once more. "Because in the end, pushing me to that limit means I have to make a point that is hurtful to you when it didn't even need to come to that conclusion." They were teenagers, sure, but it'd only be a few years before they were pressed into an adult world. If they couldn't find the level of reasoning to keep themselves tethered how could they even survive in the real world? "Then it puts us where we are, in this low ebb of a place where we're just wondering 'Well what next'. I know it isn't an easy thing, though. " That had been something that kept happening on their day off. 

Alexander was about to answer her until she told him not to, that she had been snippy. Though he had expected she already knew what he really meant by it, he wasn't asking her to suddenly toss it aside. Learning to deal and manage it came with time and learning that it was more harmful, whether she wanted to learn it or use it as a crutch and excuse was something she needed to figure out for herself. He couldn't give her every answer, somethings. . . People needed to discover on their own from within before they lost everything. "The difference in what we think about being there for someone is that I believe there is more than a single way. Because the reality is there is no way you can be there for everything, just like there is no way I can be there for everything. Moments are just not built that way, to be so convenient that it can be done like that. While at times a person can be there at that time sometimes it's when the dust clears that things are going to come crashing down that much harder." Hearing what his Mother had to say about him didn't hit him nearly as hard as waking up the next morning and realizing it still was the truth, that it was apart of his mind and who he was now. 

He watched her lean against the tree for a bit before turning his gaze towards the fountain nearby. Choices. . . Different choices are made in the moment and this Memorial reminded him of that in a strange way. It was a split second moment that decided his life, it was a sudden event that etched in him so many doubts and yet so much defiance all at once. His eyes diverted towards the sky staring at the passing clouds as he started to stare deeply into them. He wished that she wouldn't speak so loud mentally though. . .  But that had been her personal thoughts he wouldn't answer the personal reflections. 

A hand started to embrace the edge of his shoulder, the pain was starting to come back through his body again. Maybe it was the exhaustion that had been getting to him instead of his own condition, rest wasn't something he had managed to do last night. Not fully. "Aaaah. . . We still have class we need to handle today. Probably should get through that test of life first, am I right?" Alex shifted his sights towards Gerry with a soft but weak smile. "They say studying helps to work through some stuff. I call it a lie but only way to find out." He glanced around and realized something. . .  

"Derp. . . I was so focused on trying to talk to you. . . I forgot my backpack with my books. " He snorted a bit and shook his head to laugh at himself briefly. He wasn't sure what to do about the two women. The irritation, it was ill-placed, it shouldn't have been towards Cassandra. She did nothing wrong but nothing he could say would ever deter that thought from Gerry the only thing he could hope. . . Is for the two to settle the problems one to one, person to person. A hand embraced his forehead slightly as he winced. He was going to need to rest eventually. . . That or stop by Lei or Adele for a bit of an energy upper. "I'll see you in class, right? I'm pretty sure we might have a few together. "

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Sturt ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Student/Janitor✩ Shell
16 year old Muggleborn Human ☆ She/Her

"It's not anymore fun for me than it is for you," she mumbled.  She would much prefer to not have a fight, but they were like fire and water some days.  Or oil and water.  Then somethign lit the match and BOOM.  They were up in flames.

He tried explaining his side to her, and while she listened and took it in, she still didn't agree with him on all of it.  Yes, sometimes it was impossible, and that was fine, but if there was a way a person could be there, especially within hours, then she thought they should be.  Just like she should have been.  If she could open and do as he wished, he saw her as there in time, but not herself.  She would always se it as too much.  Much too late.

He spoke again, bringing her back from her mind and she looked over at himm.  His hand held his shoulder as if it hurt.  He gave her that weak smile and she sighed, raising her hands.  "Let me see that."  she said softly.  Maybe there was something she could do or advise him on.

He brought up class and she nodded.  "Yes, we do."  She stated simply.  It was why the move was postponed to later.  When he brought up not having his books or his bag, she moved to picks hers up and opened it again.  "Take whatever books you need that I have.  If nothing else we can share during lessons we both have.  If we manage to avoid that scenario, you can give them back later."

She chewed the insight of her cheek.  "Maybe.  I don't think I'm going, but we'll see."  Was her comment on him seeing her in class.  She wasn't entirely sure she really wanted to go now.  Besides, she still had some feelings she needed to get out.
 

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Spencer ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Guitarist/Vocalist - Local School Hero!✩ Kaitore
19 year old Halfbreed Sorceraic ☆ HE/HIM

"I know it isn't. . . " She was a raging fire, often one kept contained but when the right kind of material came along it'd sweep over at the first chance. As for him. . . He was more of an enduring rock that tried to be to swayed by the motions of the fire but eventually the two would have had to collide to settle the difference. Either the flames would scare the earth or the earth would quell the fire. This had been the first time he aimed to quell by the same force given and it still left a bad taste within his mouth. "But the benefit of life is that we'll get to work on that." He spoke with such certainty, he had to, if he wanted to live he needed to speak life not become downtrodden in potential death. 

Gaining perspective didn't always mean accepting it, that much he knew in life. But knowing how one another viewed things would better clear up misunderstands and in the long run better tempered to the fact that not everyone responded and thought in the same stream. It didn't make the person any less important or more important than the station that they had felt within themselves. Just simply meant the mindsets took towards different ideas and mentalities in a whole knew walk. 

His head tilted a bit as he blinked. "Huh? Oh, sure." He straightened himself up a while letting his shoulder relax. "Just a little of the usual pains is all, though. I'll just need to take a bit of pills and I'll be right as rain." Truthfully, he found that connecting with one of my Sorceraic family members did the trick much better and for far longer and probably would just connect with Adele when he saw her. That or the sneaky Lei would end up tackling him and doing the same thing. Either way he felt more secure about the issues on the school grounds. 

Take her books? Maybe she's going? A sigh escaped from him and he shook his head. He understood that there were things people needed to get off of their mind and chest but. . . "You shouldn't miss class if you don't need to, Gerry. So. . . No, I won't take your books. You'll need them, getting mines isn't that big of a deal." A soft huff pressed out once more. "Never mind - Do what you need to do, alright?" What was he going to do, twist her arm in class? If she was just going to be unfocused and unable to concentrate on her work then she needed to do what she needed to do. He knew she wasn't like him and so trying to push her to be such a way just wouldn't be fair. "I'll take some notes and stuff for you, you know, to make it fair for the effort you made for me."

After she looked at his shoulder, finding that there would be no actual physical signs of any issues that could denote a form of pain or weariness of muscles, he started to strap Sapphire onto his back. "I'll send you the information for my place and everything. Cass will be there so if you don't show up, I'd understand. " There was going to be some form of tension, he knew it, not the kind of thing he needed to be dealing with at the moment. But what else was there going to be at this point? Things were going to be hard enough walking into a home that would be hollow for him. 

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Sturt ☆ Sixth Year ☆ Student/Janitor✩ Shell
16 year old Muggleborn Human ☆ She/Her

She moved up to the tips of her toes to inspect his shoulder as best she could.  She saw nothing, found nothing.  It was probably just an ache or something right?  He said it was his normal pains and she frowned at him, taking her sunglasses off for the first time.  She remembered how he'd not wanted people to treat him like some frail piece of glass, so she didn't press the matter.  Instead she tried to massage his shoulder a little in the hopes that it would help.

He was so concerned about her missing class, but he also relented, giving in to let her do as needed.  It was a new kind of pain that she felt at the sentiment.  He wanted her to succeed, but didn't want to bar her in.  He was giving her freedom.  

She stopped massaging his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him instead.  Why?  Why did she always have to throw fits and think so awful of this impossibly sweet boy?  She didn't want him to go through the trouble of having to take her notes for her.  "No, no.  I'll go to class.  I really shouldn't be missing anyway."  Not if it would be a burden on him.

She released him as he grabbed his guitar and adjusted it.  She couldn't hide the sudden strain in her face.  She figured Cass would be there.  "I told you I'd help." she stated simply.  She was a person of her word, doing what she could to hold to it.  She'd deal with Cass' company.  For him. "You should go on ahead."  She had a fire to put out, and some knuckles to break.

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